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My Voice

4/16/2014

2 Comments

 
Only one thing is more frightening than speaking your truth, and that is not speaking it. – Naomi Wolf
Picture

I often get this visual of myself, kneeling on the ground, screaming without sound, hair flowing (the dramatics, I know), and of course, it's a beautiful place.

The place is not that important. 

Why, why, do I keep getting it.  

I am stuck, and I know it.  

There is something missing in my writing - and in my life, and I know what it is.  I just can't quite dig deep enough to get HER out.  At least, not on paper.  As if, I am waiting for the right moment. 

Or the right courage.

I need her to
come out.  


Then it hits me,  I am so SICK of being "GOOD"!  Pretty recipes and inspiring quotes are easy compared to the real work of becoming yourself.  It's a deep longing, and it's not just about me.     


"There is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in"  

Not to say that I am not grateful and appreciate what is present in my life.
I am.  

I'm just inviting the real me to show up.  

The real me has a big hunger.  While I am better at feeding the inner hunger with less

self-destructive and seemly irresponsible ways, there is always a part seeking.  

Possibly, longing to be "bad"?!!


And not in the I'll have a little dairy and gluten in my cookie kind of way.  But how can I suck every ounce out of life kind of way.  In some ways, I envy those who are content.  Or are they truly?

I accept, surrender, and have faith that what is meant to show up in my life will.  I do.  
But, I know there is so much more to me.  

And there is much more to you.  
​

Of course, what's holding me back is...​me. 

She is coming.

 I know it.  

 You will love her. 

​I do.  



Love, Only Love,


Karin
2 Comments
Julie
4/22/2014 03:29:44 pm

K- when my brother died I wanted to SMASH things. I went into the woods behind my parents' house and threw plates against rocks. It felt great- cathartic. I wanted to scream- I screamed. Waking the wild woman or inviting her back is a big deal. Allowing other women to witness your big dark feelings is brave, and I am grateful. Living fully encompasses the big trucker-mouthed moments. Keep on truckin'

Reply
Karin
4/23/2014 04:41:27 am

Julie, LOVE that.. inviting the Wild Woman back;) Showing up as our authentic selves in so liberating. I am loving my 40's so wild, so messy, so perfect. XO

Reply



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    I aim to uplift, inspire, and guide women to reconnect to themselves, to remember their wholeness, and to speak the truth about their lives. I wander & write - but mostly a mama, yogini, & wellness activist.

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